35 Slimy Snail Puns to Shell-ebrate Good Times

Disclaimer: This post may contain affiliate links for which we may make a small commission at no extra cost to you should you make a purchase.

Get ready to slow down and chuckle as we embark on a journey through 35 hilarious snail puns that promise to bring a smile to your face. These witty and delightful puns will prove that humor indeed moves at a snail’s pace.

Slow and Tell: The Funniest Snail Puns

  1. Why don’t snails shell out for sports cars? They prefer to slug it out.
  2. What did the snail say while riding on the turtle’s back? Wheeel slow down!
  3. Snails don’t use computers because they’re afraid of the esc key.
  4. I tried to catch some fog. I mist, but I did catch a snail. Must have been the slime of my life.
  5. You don’t want to engage in a race with a snail. They always come in slug-ish last.

Slime-time Comedy

  1. Why did the snail paint its shell? To snail its first impression.
  2. What do you call a snail on a ship? A snailor.
  3. Why was the snail invited to the party? Because he slimes up the place!
  4. Did you hear about the snail who forgot his shell? He was a bit sluggish without it.
  5. Snails are not allowed to work in tech support. They’re too slow to esc.

Gastropod Giggles

  1. What do snails eat with their burgers? Slime-on.
  2. I bought a faster snail, but it was just a slime improvement.
  3. Why don’t snails fight each other? They don’t like to shell out violence.
  4. What’s a snail’s favorite game? Slug-of-war.
  5. Why do snails hate shopping online? Too many esc scams.

Shelled Laughs

  1. Why did the snail cross the road? To slug it out with the other side.
  2. What kind of music do snails listen to? Shell-ow tunes.
  3. Did you hear about the snail who went to the car race? He wanted to shell at the sidelines.
  4. Snails are really into escapism literature.
  5. Why don’t snails ever start a diet? They can’t resist fast food.

The Slime-Light

  1. What’s a snail’s favorite type of weather? Slimy with a chance of lettuce.
  2. Why was the snail rejected from the sports team? Too slow for the relay-shell.
  3. What does a snail wear to a wedding? A shell-ix.
  4. How do snails keep their shells shiny? With slug polish.
  5. When snails go on vacation, they like to slug it out on the beach.

Molluscan Mirth

  1. Why did the snail go to the psychiatrist? It had slime self-esteem.
  2. What do you call a snail who loves to workout? A mollusc-le builder.
  3. Snails don’t get very far in the music industry. They can’t handle the slimelight.
  4. What’s a snail’s favorite TV show? Slime and Punishment.
  5. Why aren’t snails good in finance? They’re not great with shell-lings.

Escargot Euphoria

  1. Why did the snail get a Twitter account? To tweet about its shellf.
  2. What do young snails aspire to be? Slime-fighters.
  3. How do snails prevent their homes from being stolen? They use shell-ocks.
  4. What’s a snail’s favorite kind of shoes? Sneakers. They can’t be too loud.
  5. Why do snails dislike summer? Too much salt on the roads.