45 Numbers That Count: Hilariously Sum-tastic Math Puns

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Looking for a fun way to spice up your math conversations? Dive into our collection of 45 hilarious math puns that promise to make numbers side-splittingly funny!

Add Some Humor

  1. Why was six scared of seven? Because seven eight nine!
  2. Don’t argue with decimals; they always have a point.
  3. I’ll stop at nothing to avoid using negative numbers.
  4. Parallel lines have so much in common. It’s a shame they’ll never meet.
  5. I told my friend 10 jokes about math. Unfortunately, zero got laughed at.
  6. Without geometry, life is pointless.
  7. Old mathematicians never die; they just disappear.
  8. There’s a fine line between a numerator and a denominator. (Only a fraction of you will get this!)
  9. Decimals have a point; fractions are just pointless.
  10. My favorite math pun is Radian. It’s rad, I guess.
  11. I heard Pi stopped at a bar. It had an infinite night out, couldn’t find its way home!
  12. What do you call friends who love math? Algebros.
  13. A book never written: “Where’s My Parabola?” by Seymour Graphs.
  14. Triangles are the most social polygons. They’re always up for a tangle.
  15. Dividing by zero is a really unthinkable act.

Multiplying Laughter

  1. Math in public? I’m afraid I might sum it wrong.
  2. To the guy who invented zero: Thanks for nothing!
  3. Calculus students are derivatives of their teachers.
  4. How do mathematicians plow fields? With a pro-tractor.
  5. I have a phobia of negative numbers. I’ll stop at nothing to avoid them.
  6. What’s a math teacher’s favorite place to go on vacation? Times Square.
  7. Algebra puns are too linear, geometry puns are too plane, but calculus puns are derivative.
  8. Bacteria growth is the only culture I’m interested in – it’s an exponential experience.
  9. What do you call numerical coffee? Decimal.
  10. Can February March? No, but April May!

Divide and Conquer Humor

  1. Why do plants hate math? It gives them square roots.
  2. Mathematicians are great at camping because they know how to use log tables.
  3. Why was the equal sign so humble? Because it realized it wasn’t less than or greater than anyone else.
  4. My math book is committing treason. It has too many radical expressions.
  5. Why don’t we serve beer at math parties? Because you can’t drink and derive.
  6. Why did the two fours skip lunch? Because they already 8.
  7. Positive anything is better than negative nothing.
  8. Did you hear about the constipated mathematician? He worked it out with a pencil.
  9. Why is six afraid of seven in hexadecimal? Because seven eight A.
  10. What do you call a number that can’t keep still? A roamin’ numeral.

Subtract Your Worries

  1. Why was the math book sad? It had too many problems.
  2. What’s the official animal of Pi Day? The Pi-thon.
  3. Breaking up with algebra is hard. I know she’s my X but I always find myself looking for Y.
  4. A negative attitude towards math is subtracting from your potential.
  5. Why do we teach kids about trigonometry? To help them sine up for good jobs.
  6. Graphing is where I draw the line.
  7. Why did the scarecrow become a successful mathematician? He was outstanding in his field.
  8. Why is it sad to break up with a math student? They take longer to get over their X.
  9. An imaginary number and a negative number got into an argument. It was a complex situation.
  10. Why did seven eat nine? Because you’re supposed to eat meals a day.